The end & the beginning

Whew! That was an intense experience. I have completed the 14-week student teaching program, and I can breathe a sigh of relief (at least until I consider the job market). During my last week, my university supervisor met with my cooperating teacher to discuss my progress, my strengths, and my opportunities for improvement. Then, they agreed on my grade while I waited patiently outside the classroom. Once my supervisor informed me that I was successful, and we talked about my future in the profession, my paperwork was completed in order for UTD to request certification from the state. I previously applied online for certification and completed the fingerprinting process, so I'll be ready to go when my skills and eagerness match up with a career opportunity. I expect my offical certificate to be ready in January! I have applied online for a teaching position, and we'll see what happens...until then, I will substitute-teach. Mid-year is a strange time to graduate and seek a position, but you never know what can happen.

The kids were great on my last day; they gave me cards, best wishes, and hugs. Some even cried, and I saw how true it is that a teacher can really impact the lives of his/her students. I will miss them all, and I have to remind myself that I am not abandoning them - this is a natural part of the process, though I can't help but feel as though I'm leaving them at a strange time. Maybe it doesn't feel this way when you student teach in spring, because then everyone is geared up for the summer break. I care about all my students, and I hope to see them again.

It has not yet fully sunk in that I am a professional now. I am a teacher. I am no longer a student. I am no longer nervous standing in front of a class. I have survived spontaneous walk-throughs by administrators, last-minute changes to lesson plans, and a classroom brawl. I have navigated parent-teacher conferences, faculty meetings, and avoided the negativity in the teachers' lounge. I am confident that even when I make a mistake, it can be used as a teaching opportunity, and that even on my bad days, I still provide my students with valuable lessons. I am ready for my classroom, and I can't wait to meet my students.

Of course I will continue to grow as an educator during my first year of teaching and beyond. Teaching is a profession that requires constant learning, growth, and additional training. I will continue to hone my skills, seek out the best resources for my students, and learn which procedures work best in my class.

I wish all of you on a parallel journey the best of luck. For those of you about to embark on this educational odyssey, you need only to look back at my earlier posts to see what an emotional, at times scary, but ultimately rewarding experience this is. If you are thinking about the teacher certification program at the University of Texas at Dallas, rest assured that it is worth the hard work. Yes, a lot is asked of you. You will need to pass your certification exams prior to student teaching, for example; however, you will be supported by the program, be well-prepared for the profession, and enjoy the esteem that comes along with graduating from UTD's program. Whatever your circumstances, thank you for taking this journey with me. I hope I have given you a little insight into the challenges and rewards of student teaching.

Savvy Suggestion: Always remember what teaching is really about, and don't get bogged down by anything else. It's all background noise compared to what you are really doing to help your students. Teachers make all other professions possible; teachers make a difference.

From Gobble-gobble to Ho Ho Ho

Approaching Thanksgiving break, I felt pretty confident. I finally knew all the kids' names. I had hit my stride. The kids were used to me; I was used to them. Everything was good. Then, they realized vacation was just around the corner. Insanity crept in, and not just with the kids. The teachers, including myself, were tired. Simply put, we all needed the vacation. I found that scheduling assignments that required intense focus and hard work near the end of the week before a vacation is not a good plan. The kids alternated between a zombie-like state and hyperactivity (neither good for focusing). This is not to say that they should be given a pass prior to breaks and not expected to work, but keep in mind that some activities are better suited to these days than others.

The week of Thanksgiving offered a nice break. Several days off in a row provided just the respite we all needed. I slept in. I even managed to go a couple of days without planning lessons. I felt renewed. I even missed my students! I really did. I thought everyone would return after the break ready to go, but that wasn't the case universally. The teachers all seemed reinvigorated, but the students came back tired. Their sleep schedules were obviously out-of-whack. They came back lethargic and suffering from memory loss seemingly specific to what they learned prior to the break. Then there were a couple of days of relative normality before they began to ask when they would be out for winter break. Much to their dismay, final exams stand between now and their next vacation if they are in middle or high schools, and almost all grade-levels are beginning to prepare for standardized testing (if they have not already done so). There is a lot of curriculum to cover in the next couple of weeks, and the students are not entirely focused. This creates a challenge and a need for creative and engaging lessons. Teachers of younger students can sometimes use class winter parties as incentives, while middle and high school teachers have to use other incentives to encourage active learning.

This is also the time of year when fall student teachers prepare to leave the classrooms that, hopefully, we've come to love. I know that I have worked hard to build rapport with my students, and while I am happy to be nearing certification as an educator (and can't wait to get my own classroom), I am sad to be leaving my students behind. I say "my students" because since the second week of school, I have taken responsibility for them along with their successes and failures.

It is important at this point to send out resumes, thank the teachers and staff who have supported you during your time as a guest in their school, and take a minute to thank the kids for all they have taught you - because you learned as much from them as they did from you. Next week is my last week student teaching, and I will be observing other teachers in the building. This not only broadens my education, but also helps the students and cooperating teacher get used to working together again. It will be very strange that first day that I don't have to get up and go teach my classes. I can't help feeling a bit sad.

Savvy Suggestion: Prepare something to say to your students on your last day, and be sure to thank them sincerely for all that they have done to help you on your journey. Let them know, one last time, how much you care about them and their success.

I'm still here...

I don't know how many of you are following my student-teaching trek (I didn't put a counter on the blog because I didn't really want to know), but in case you were wondering why I haven't blogged...it's because I have been extraordinarily busy. You will hear your professors say that student-teaching is not an 8-3 (or similar hours) job. They know what they're talking about. You will be at school early and leave late, assuming you are putting your best effort into the experience. When you get home, you will still find yourself taking care of lesson-planning, etc. If you are also trying to work part-time, take classes, have a family, or other time-consuming areas of life, expect to be spread extremely thin. Then, add to that all the unpredictable occurrences in life, and you will feel like you're drowning some days. So, now that I have shared the reality of the schedule woes and explained my absence from blogging, here's what's new...
 
I had my first experience with a violent student recently. The student often comes into class upset, but I am usually proactive and help the child calm down before class starts. On this particular occasion, that approach didn't work. When the student began throwing a temper tantrum and the other students became worried, this merely enraged the student more. A violent outburst ensued, and I needed to call security. Make sure you know the extension before you need it. It just so happened that I had never been told (or admittedly looked for it myself) the extension to call, so mid-outburst, I was looking through the handbook for the number. During that extra minute, something awful could have happened. I should have been more prepared.
 
Other than that, my pacing is improving - though sometimes it is still difficult when I'm creating lesson plans to figure out exactly how long each segment will take in order for the students to complete a specific task. Some things that should be easy take an excruciatingly long time, while other tasks that you think will take quite a while are done in no time and you have to come up with an additional activity quick! I often ask my CT for advice on this issue, but it gets easier to plan as I gain experience. Classroom management with one group is still a nightmare. If anyone has expertise on how to get a really chatty group of kids to just stop talking for 5 minutes, let me know. Seriously, respond to this message if you have a great idea. I have tried everything, from humor to detentions (also proximity, the teacher glare, changing seats, and so on). Some kids have really improved as I've built rapport with them, but others sincerely do not care to be in school at this point in their lives. I wish I could magically bestow a work ethic and a desire to learn onto them.
 
Savvy Suggestion: Another thing that professors will tell you that is absolutely true is that people in this profession talk and your reputation will spread - so make it a good one! I just learned that someone was having a conversation about me at a completely different school, and I don't know who the connection is. I don't think it is my CT, so who's doing the talking? Hmmmm...it's really strange. I'm pretty confident that I'm doing the best job I possibly can, so I prefer to imagine that the conversation was positive. Work hard, be true to yourself, and eagerly learn as much as possible! It goes without saying that you should be professional at all times - be on time, dress the part, etc.

One month down...

This might just be one of the strangest experiences of my life. The ups and downs from day to day are unpredictable and emotionally exhausting. The old cliche comes to mind; what doesn't kill us, makes us stronger. I know I'm not alone in feeling this way; I have spoken with several other student teachers who feel completely frustrated one day, and renewed the next. It even changes from one hour to the next. One class period might be on task and your lesson is going well - you even see that spark in the students' eyes as they "get it." The next period might be a classroom management nightmare. The lesson runs amuck. NO ONE seems to understand. You feel like you're fighting a losing battle - all while your CT watches (supposedly not judging you, but how could he/she not be?). If you feel this way, and you most likely will, you are not alone.

My US just observed me for the second time, and it was during one of those days when I felt dejected and disillusioned. The debriefing that followed the observation still went well, and my US offered some great suggestions for engaging the students. One strategy for helping with time management (that I learned in Classroom Management but haven't implemented yet) is the use of a timer with a bell to signal when the time alotted for an activity has ended. I have been giving verbal time warnings, such as "5 more minutes", etc., but the alarm is a great tool that helps me keep track of time and get students' attention better than a verbal "time's up" from me (especially if it's an activity during which students are allowed to talk). My US offered several other helpful suggestions as well. Remember, that's what your US if for! They are great resources, chosen for their experiences in the field, so remember to utilize yours.

I have not been good about calling my US to discuss my frustrations, because I tend to try to solve problems on my own. However, I strongly suggest that you talk with yours before the stress starts to wear you down too much. You can't perform your best when you begin to feel lost or miserable. I promise to be better about taking my own advice for the remaining 2/3 of my student teaching experience.

For now, I feel renewed. The day after my 2nd observation, the one during which I felt dejected, I had a kid who wouldn't turn in assignments before turn something in after his conversation with me. He even initiated a high-five with me. I saw some students make some important breakthroughs because of me! I feel like I'm in the right profession again. I just need more practice.

If you can't tell, I tend to be verbose (or quite wordy) once I begin writing, so I will list a few things that have caused me stress so far. I will re-visit these later in the semester to let you know what solutions I have found, because I WILL find solutions.

1) A lack of autonomy
2) Feeling like a guest in a class where I'm supposed to take charge
3) Having a vastly different vision/style than my CT
4) Classroom management (too much talking, kids off-task, etc.)
5) Ridiculously long hours (this will vary for you depending on your CT)
6) Lesson plans that are constantly in flux and not solely up to me - I would like to know where I'm headed so I can help the kids get there!

Savvy Suggestion: Hang in there! Some days, you will want to quit, or at least question whether or not you made the right career choice. Things won't always go according to plan. Then, things will come together. You will see that spark in a kid's eyes, they will high-five you, you will make a real difference in a student's life sooner than you expect to. You will find your groove, and feel amazing.

Week 3 in Review

What a rollercoaster ride! Last week, I had my first observation. I was nervous that the class period being observed would not behave well and allow me (and themselves) to shine as brightly as possible, and I had good reason to feel that way. The classes that I have assumed responsibility for are very problematic in the area of classroom management. The very large number of students routinely talk during instruction, and they do not display any type of work ethic whatsoever. They simply do not care (yet).

When my University Supervisor (US) entered the class and sat in the back, it did not phase the students at all. They acted as horribly as they have on other days. I do not blame the little darlin's, to use a Van-ism; they have obviously not been taught to meet certain expectations in the classroom. I was trying my best - using the proximity method to influence behavior, speaking to kids who refused to work, and asking the class to listen before I gave instructions. However, both my US and I found that I ended up speaking over them in many cases, and repeating information too many times to count.

My US suggested that I stop and wait for them to be quiet before speaking, and that has been helping. Now, when students notice that I can't give them helpful instruction because a classmate is talking, they use peer pressure in a postive way to help silence the room. The only downside to this method is that I have had some interference from the Cooperating Teacher (CT), who likes to jump in and lecture during the momentary lull. The CT is unknowingly sabotaging my efforts (in several other ways, too), so a discussion is in order, most likely including my US for support.

The classroom management issues in a couple of my classes, combined with a wide range of students' abilities, have been a challenge. On the upside, several students have shown a marked increase of respect toward me, and that feels awesome. When a kid feels comfortable coming to you with questions, it's an awesome feeling!

Savvy Suggestion: You may have to assert your autonomy if you have an overbearing CT. Your US can help you to do so without stepping on your CT's toes.